On the bench? Think Kyrgyzstan!

Good news! Our company just won a lucrative 5-year contract to support the Kyrgyzstan Border Service against transnational threats!

That means we desperately need some voluntary folks to fulfill our duties to this former Soviet state, the 2nd poorest country of Central Asia. Don't worry, it's the safest place east of Montreal, I've been told the Kyrgyzstan's border is one cool place to hang out and those "transnational threats" are just one of those things. Rumors at best.

I'd love you fill you in about this project but I'm reviewing the list of members rotting on the bench and I'm selecting those who will participate on this 5-year mission. To explore strange new Turkish worlds, to seek out new earnings and profitable growth, to boldly bill where no one has gone before!

No security clearance is required but you will have to go through a short training program to handle automatic weapons. Don't worry, it's just there might be coyotes roaming during the night and adequate protection on your side will lower the turnover rate on the project.

Roach out.